Little People, Big Hoarders

I want to talk about, “the little people.” And no…I don’t mean the ones who come in the night to steal my car keys and frolick around my living room, giggling and singing in their annoying high pitched voices, (I’ve already reported their inconsiderate asses to the authorities) – what I’m talking about is the apparent rise in popularity of the day to day goings-on of dwarves.

If you spend any time flipping channels like I do, you begin to see the trend I’m talking about. I believe it started with, “Little People, Big World” – and yes, at first I found the show to be no less than adorable. Watching gnome-like people raise a family, go to work, live, love, laugh and try to reach things that are pushed too far back on the counter tops – frankly – it was heartwarming.

What was once intriguing, has now become an obsession. Now there’s “The Little Couple” and “The Little Chocolatiers,” what other professions and life circumstances do we need to see? We get it already….they’re little, and they can do all the things big people can do except touch their nose with out leaning in a little – but that’s okay! We are NOT here to judge.

I have to admit – my interest in the life and times of the little people has waned some. I have recently discovered, “Hoarders” – I can’t tear myself away from the TV when that show is on. I actually have to pause several times just so I can look over at my partner in shock and horror. It’s unbelievable to me that someone thinks it’s completely acceptable to soil themselves in an adult diaper rather than have a plumber come out to fix the toilet……..think about that for a minute. There is so much trash and crap in your house that even if you found a plumber, willing to risk getting a rare skin eating virus to come out to your house – once there – would he be able to find the bathroom?? It’s uncanny.

I had the realization the other day that I am at grave risk of becoming completely disensitized to the plight of the human condition. Very little shocks me anymore. I have seen people with root vegetables growing out of their sofa, I’ve seen the skeletal remains of animals found underneath a pile of People Magazines and socks. I even saw a woman who had a hole chewed in her wall by billy goats and didn’t even know it until one of them was found in her living room, eating his way through her collection of dryer sheets and lint.

I imagine that before long – when we’ve seen enough of – “The Little Litigants, The Little Barista, or The Little Decorator” – our fascination with dwarves might diminish. The fail safe to keep this from happening? Hoarders who collect little people. Let your imagine run free!